Man Finally Gets Capri Sun Open Using Jackhammer

January 29, 2018

OAHU, HI – After attempting to open his Capri Sun juice pouch with the appended straw for 20 minutes until it bent and broke, Billy Bartle resorted to using an industrial grade demolition jackhammer to […]


Fruit Salad Remains Untouched at BBQ

January 27, 2018

PLANO, TX – Guests at “Burgers by Burglars”, a community service event where local felons serve hamburgers to young children and their families, reported that while the patties, mustard, pop, and other food went pretty […]